I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
No subtext here. People are naked.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
