Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
My penis needs a shock collar
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
