That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Randomize