you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
