grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
