Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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