its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
