I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
