STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
