i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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