Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
