Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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