3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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