We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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