Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
