real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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