one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
