we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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