sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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