I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Someone shattered a urinal.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
