My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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