Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
is it fun? or sober?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize