i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
