road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
