Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
