Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
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