wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
