yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
