Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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