i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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