I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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