They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
