i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
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