I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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