Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
