I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
How naked do you want me to be?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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