You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
