all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
