do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
