i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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