He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
