soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
