Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize