How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
