I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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