Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I can't turn off my feet"
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
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