Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My vagina just clenched in fear
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