Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
