So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
So vagazzling was a success
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
