Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
